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Ping to Woo: Keep Your Scavenger Hands Off My Man

Written by:
Guest
Published on:
Mar/26/2009

It's turning into a cat fight of epic proportion.  Marc Lesnick's girlfriend, Ping, responded to Gambling911.com Senior International Correspondent, Jenny Woo's, announcement that she intended to seduce the Casino Affiliate Convention organizer while covering the Amsterdam event this coming week.

Woo has already begun Twittering about her future exploits.   She went as far as to accuse Ping of taking tax payer stimulus bonuses.

"I think she (Jenny) needs to find her own man," said Ping on Wednesday.  "First off, I'm not a Bank President as Jenny implied in her article.  I'm a financial advisor."

Woo dumped her controlling brain surgeon boyfriend a few months back claiming he spent more time in the mirror dolling himself up than she did.

Ping has now purchased a ticket to fly to Amsterdam where she intends to latch onto her man, saying that she needs to "keep the riff raff at a distance", perhaps making reference to Jenny. 

Ping, who has a black belt in karate, stopped short of suggesting she would "kick Woo's half Korean, half Redneck ass".  Woo, meanwhile, works out at the gym regularly and has increased her muscle mass dramatically.

"Bring it on you Wall Street bonus hoarding banker!" Woo challenged. 

The last thing Lesnick needs is to have two women fighting over him and a potential blood bath.  Then again...

It was just this past January where a series of altercations took place during a competing organization's event.  During CAP Euro in London, three bodyguards assaulted the son of Gambling Portal Webmaster Association President, Michael Corfman. 

Woo, as an International Correspondent and world acclaimed journalist who has interviewed Washington dignataries such as Ron Paul, Barney Frank and Dick Armey, was asked to cover the Amsterdam event.

But many still remember Woo's last "near altercation" with none other than Dancing With The Stars winner, Brooke Burke.

"I almost kicked her ass in," said Woo, who felt that Burke was acting like a prima donna during her appearance at a Sportsbook.com Super Bowl party.

"As I recall, Jenny may have had a few too many drinks," said Dave Stanley, Spokesperson for Sportsbook.com, during a recent trip to Costa Rica. These days, Jenny's blood alcohol level typically sits around zero, similar to poker pro Layne Flack's.

And it now appears as if Lesnick will have competition for Jenny's affection.

Jeremy Enke, of Poker Affiliate Listings, declared on Wednesday that he will be making Ms. Woo his bride before the Amsterdam event has even concluded.

"Her name will be Jenny Woo Enke by the end of the evening. Early odds on this have to be 3-1."

But unless Enke has something other to offer than his good looks and charm (i.e. an ad contract worth around $500,000 for the year), Gambling911.com has issued odds of this happening at 10000-1. 

Sparky Collins, Gambling911.com's resident Cuban Transgender reporter, has vowed to protect Jenny from the likes of Ping and maybe even Jeremy Enke.  Collins fought in Angola against South Africa as part of the Cuban army.  He was a sniper who killed many in the field. 

"Jenny, she cannot fight!" observed Sparky.  "The only way she has of protecting herself is those fake breasts that can be used as life preservers."

Collins, who used an inner tube to make the 90 mile escape from Cuba into Florida over a decade ago, gave odds of Jenny winning a fight against black belt Ping at 100 to 1. 

"Thanks for the show of confidence Goldie Locks!" a bitter Woo expressed.

Caught in the middle is the dapper don, Marc Lesnick, who is just as eager to collect Star Wars action figures as he is running online gambling and dating conferences, let alone have women fight over him.  Lesnick is also the king of the dating conference circuit where he instructs other Web entrepreneurs on the fine art of dating, despite having dated a woman years back who bore an uncanny resemblance to Glen Close in Fatal Attraction and acted like her as well.

Despite all the rhetoric, Woo has vowed to be "good" at the CAC Amsterdam.  The last time she attended, Ms. Woo had to be rescued from her room after falling into a coma. 

"Probably induced by alcohol," Ping balked. 

Hotel security broke through Woo's door with bolt cutters the morning she was to depart back to the States. 

Woo will be attending the PKR Poker Affiliate Dinner Sunday night in Amsterdam.

"It appears that CAC2008 will not be lacking in drama," said Thomas Jensen, proprietor of the Point-Spreads.com website, who will be in attendance at the Amsterdam event.  Jensen, who has a photograph of Bodog Founder, Calvin Ayre, hanging over his bed and once swam naked in Ayre's now squatter-infested swimming pool while a few dozen others watched in shock, admitted he was hoping for a little bit of excitement at CAC Amsterdam.  "Say what you will about the CAP events, there is always some incident that takes place whether it's a raid, brawl or the conference organizers forgetting to show up at their own event in Cancun this past week.  I think Marc's conferences need a little spark, to be more sexy."

And what can be more sexy than two hot Asian women going at it, we ask? 

Gambling911.com Staff

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